Short Distance Relationships

Mr. Unicycle lives in Milwaukee. I live in the northwest suburbs of Chicago, which is about a 2 hour drive, 1.5 if I'm coming from work--which I usually am. Most people in LDRs would kill for this kind of proximity. I even know people who live this far apart and don't consider their relationship to be an LDR (granted, they are middle aged divorcees who don't feel the need to see their SO every day, but still). Even though 2 hours isn't that bad in the scheme of relationship commutes, it still feels pretty bad.

 

Image via Google Maps. MS Paint job by me.

I only see Mr. Unicycle on the weekends, because it doesn't really make sense logistically or economically to drive to Wisconsin for an evening or an afternoon. And I don't even see him every weekend. Sometimes he has to spend the entire weekend studying and I have to stay home and entertain myself. It's not hard to entertain myself, but it doesn't stop me from missing him. Being in an SDR has it's perks, I suppose, but it also has its cons.

 

Image via Movie Posters Hut

Hey, 2 hours on the highway is quite a distance.

Pros:

• Every time I visit Mr. Unicycle it's like a mini vacation, and we plan fun things to do together.
• Absence really does make the heart grow fonder, and we fight a lot less now that we don't see each other every day. Not that we fight a lot. Okay, we do. We're that couple. The couple who bickers publicly and makes everyone else feel uncomfortable and then secretly is sweet to each other, but only behind closed doors. Like Dionne and Murray.
• We've been able to work on being by ourselves and living our own lives, not depending on each other for everything all the time. 
• I don't bother him when he's trying to study. He doesn't bother me when I'm trying to watch Jersey Shore. Or blog. Or make wedding crafts.

 

Image via Toothpaste for Dinner

 Cons:

• Every time I leave Milwaukee my heart breaks all over again. 
• If we skip a weekend, I have to go 2 weeks without seeing him, which sucks.
• My friends and family always complain that I go to Milwaukee too much and I'm never around. I rarely make spontaneous weekend plans because each weekend is pre-planned and dictated by his study schedule.
• I hate driving on the highway. It terrifies me, and I'm pretty sure I'm bad at it. Plus, it's expensive, and it uses up a lot of time. Our weekends together aren't even 48 hours long, ever.
• Planning a wedding is so much more difficult when the bride and groom don't live in the same city. Every time we try to meet with a vendor, we have to do it on a weekend and choose one when he'll be able to come home.
• I'm not a middle-aged divorcee, so I would like to see him every day. 

Personal pic

This is the face I get when we say goodbye.

Looks like there are more cons than pros. An SDR is better than an LDR though, because at least we could visit each other for just an evening if we had to, or if there was an emergency. But it's also worse, because we get no sympathy. No one cares that I often go weeks at a time without seeing Mr. Unicycle. It's like having a paper cut. It hurts so bad, but it's the definition of a pansy injury.

Are you in an SDR? LDR? What are your pros and cons? You have sympathy for me, right?